Does the word “change” mean FEAR or EXCITEMENT for you?
Change has been a familiar companion of mine over my years upon this earth. As a young child, my father worked for a company that transferred both he, and his family to different locations regularly; resulting in my early learning about goodbyes and hellos to friends, peers and surrounding neighbors. I left home at 17 and travelled alone across the continent to enter university in Utah. I got off the plane not yet knowing where my new home would be, and spent the following day finding an apartment and 5 new roommates who would become my substitute family.
I was married by 19, and my (then) husband was an adventurous personality, so I spent much of our 16 years together re-locating and adjusting to his new jobs as well as the church community that embraced us. My first baby had 3 doctors. One who cared for our first trimester, one who delivered our baby, and the third which completed my six week post-partum check-up. Moreover life has continued keeping me ever alert to the whispering winds of change, my last change being one of the more significant ones in my life – possibly “the” most significant.
One year ago, I was living in British Columbia, and had a private practice as a mediator plus a part-time position as a legal advocate for a community centre. It was around this time that I began to feel that a major change would occur. At first I resisted the notion, because I liked that my life was predictable. Even so, resisting just made my life more difficult. Eventually I surrendered to the path that began forming before me, and I am now here, with my life completely different. I no longer have a residence of my own nor do I live near my 5 children. I have closed my private practice and suspended my position as a counselor indefinitely, and presently I don’t know what the future holds for me career-wise. I surmise in this very moment that change can be both excitement AND fear for me. The excitement comes easily when I am connected to my divine part and have complete trust in the Universe. The fear leaks out when the practical and logical part of me becomes frightened and feels unworthy and unprepared to step into my highest potential as a lightworker and servant for humanity. Even so, my deep knowing continues to tell me that I’m on the right path, and to only stay aware of the present moment – to stay away from pondering the future. My guess is that there will be many changes yet to unfold over the next few years but knowing too much about those changes will probably get in the way of this magical and mystical experience. So I choose to embrace change as exciting and to stay in trust throughout it’s process.