Monthly Archives: May 2012

Does your faith allow you to accept what you don’t always understand?

Does your faith allow you to accept what you don’t always understand?

There is really SO MUCH that occurs that I don’t understand… at least in the moment that it occurs.  Taking time to explore it in peace, calm and isolation allows understanding to seep in slowly through my faith.  I have a certain knowing about the Universal concepts that never change.  Concepts like “Everything happens for a reason”, or “This too shall pass” and even “We live in a friendly Universe”.  But it doesn’t stop the emotional pain from deciding to move-in and take residence in my lower three chakras when something happens that I can’t make sense of. 

 

I know that living in this life and upon this planet means that we signed up for an emotional school situation in a material and physical reality.  This means that much of our experience can be dense and weighted… both literally and vibrationally.  Relating to another in this life often causes grief and brings us down.  There are moments of delight and high-level vibrating, but because of our human-ness, we will inevitably find ourselves “stunned, in pain and not in complete understanding of what just occurred”.  Continuing to relate to others deeply can at times feel like a useless endeavor.

 

It is the larger picture, of course, that matters.  Every time we meet a person or situation that uses a stun-gun on us, we are in a ripe opportunity for colossal learning.  So there we stand, like a deer in the headlights, holding our wound openly, and we realize with clarity “nothing makes sense… I don’t understand… and what now?”  I think the “what now?” question is the important question to consider; because there are those who think that they have NO choice about the “what now” of the situation. And yet we do.

 

This is what separates the conscious from the sleeping humans.  Sleeping humans think that life happens “to them”, and conscious humans know that it is they who “make things happen”.  PERSPECTIVE is everything, and there are so many perspectives to choose from.  Fling the closet wide open and look at all the colors and styles that are hanging before you.  Pick something that feels comfortable, appeals to your taste, is easy to view, and exudes positive energy.  Pick a high vibrating perspective that is full of love and gratitude.  When we can keep our thoughts and ideas vibrating high, we are suddenly available for the Divine informational downloads which “gift us” with personal understanding and answers.  These downloads come in many ways, such as dreams, conversations with others, signs, movies, even pictures and concepts that come to our mind’s eye during quiet moments. 

 

Our personal faith develops and expands in the empty durations between the initial pain and eventual understanding. Those durations can be longer than what we think we can endure.  Recall another Universal truth, which says… “We are never given an experience that we don’t have the full resources to handle”.   So having just experienced one of these “what the hell happened?” experiences myself, I now feel ready to say, “I chose to continue in love with every step that I take”.

Do your mistakes become lessons or guilt?

Do your mistakes become lessons or guilt?

My mistakes always eventually become my lessons, however I have noticed that they have often, in my past travelled through a default route of Guilt and Self-doubt first.  Even so, I am noticing that as I learn more and more about myself, and become kinder and gentler with myself, that the time I spend on the path of Guilt and Self-doubt has reduced significantly.

 

I remember the days when I would isolate myself from loved ones during the after-math of what I considered a significant mistake, and my Inner Critic presented his full force of wrath and berating upon me.  I look back and see how much power and attention that I gave my Inner Critic, and I now can acknowledge how unbalancing that was for the rest of me.

 

One day I was conversing with a spiritual mentor, who sensed the breadth and height of my Inner Critic, and said to me… “You know Laura, you would never speak to another person in the manner that your Inner Critic is speaking to you… In fact, my sense is that your Inner Critic is quite abusive towards you… and from what I know about you… I suspect that you would never act in that manner towards those in your life”.  I was absolutely stunned at her words.

 

Some of my surprised came from the fact that she knew and heard the actual voices inside my head.  This was some years ago, and I had not yet met a psychic, nor had recognized my own psychic abilities.  I was just awakening.

 

The second part of my surprise what the word “abuse”.  I have spent most of my adult life advocating for those who were abused.  Teaching them, guiding them, protecting them and navigating them through the bureaucracy of the inefficient systems that surrounded them.  Imagine my surprise when the “abuse” word was being used to describe what my being-ness was experiencing?  And further to that… who was present to advocate for her?  No one (at the time)… until I became aware of how much power I had given my Inner Critic.

 

Since that time, the Inner Critic and the rest of me, have had a frank conversation, and the job description has been adjusted and revamped.  Inner Critic is partnered up with the Perfectionist part of me, and both are still allowed to “remind me of dates, list items and convey to me the big picture goals”.  Additionally their input has to be limited to “only the facts”… and “use nice words”.  So since those adjustments, I have been able to bypass the un-scenic route of guilt and self-doubt, and go straight to the “gem” (or lesson) of the circumstance or event.

 

I’m actually glad that I didn’t “fire” the Inner Critic and Perfectionist, because they have done a lot for me in my life.  They just get a little over zealous and Ego-filled if they are given the chance to hijack my being.  Now they are a valued part of my executive team, and I’m happy to have them sit at my conference table.

 

Please ENJOY this talented and beautiful artist, who is also my classmate. She sings a quirky and humorous song about the PERFECTIONIST sub-personality that many of us have.  There is no better healing than laughing at ourselves xo

VIDEO – The Perfectionist : By ERIN