What we have forgotten - past life experiences

We are Not a Human Beings having a spiritual experience:we are spiritual beings having a Human Experience
— Suraj Dahal 
Our wounds are often the openings into the best and most beautiful part of us.
— David Richo


As a very young child, I experienced glimpses of memories from my real home that were like knowing about something that was “on the tip of my tongue” yet remained elusive. I understood that being human had severe limitations, and it took me some time to resign myself to those limitations.  I began my childhood spending much of my time and imagination in other realms.  I was also clear very early that my mother was someone who I had experienced many other lives with.  That she and I knew each other deeply, and that we came here together to encourage and remind each other not only of our potential, but also of our faults.

This knowing has not always been comfortable for either of us.  Having a common trait of impatience, we can either spur one another on, or trigger each other in ways that are frustrating and painful.  Our contract has required from each of us the ability to consider one another’s behaviors and actions from a larger scope and give one another the benefit of the doubt.  We have at difficult junctures, taken time away from each other to reflect, to heal, to forgive and finally to return to each other with a deeper knowing about ourselves and the other.

 Born with irregular sight, I was a timid toddler. Even so, poor sight also amplified other senses.  I could hear, smell and taste with acute sensitivity.  I also sensed things on an energetic level that most people were unaware of. My mother was afraid of how the world would affect me. She was highly protective, always desiring to keep me safe.  At times I felt suffocated and restrained. 

One day, when I was maybe 3 or 4 years old, my mother and I were in a charged disagreement. My mother was attempting to confine my movements by holding me down in a sitting position.  I was wriggling and struggling against being held in place while she was attempting to keep me still. Being much smaller than her, I could feel that I was losing the physical battle. For a brief instant I stopped struggling and my mother and I looked at one another.  

The moment was pregnant and profound.  I raised my pudgy little hand and pointed my finger at her threateningly.  “You just wait!”, I hissed.  “You just wait… because the next time… when I am big, and you are little… you are really going to get it!”

 That memorable event has incurred laughter in each of us as we recall it, and yet it was a significant glimpse to remind us that we have indeed been many roles for one another within many various lifetimes.  We have been friends, confidants, teachers, adversaries and students of one another in untold and varied circumstances.

Several years ago, I went to Arizona to experience some past life hypnosis with a graduate of Michael Newton’s work.  We spent two full days together going deep into hypnosis to connect with scenes from other lives, realms and existences.  At the time, I was wanting to understand more about the relationship I had with my mother, among other things.  Many scenes were brought forth with ease, relating to many areas of this present life, and I found the experience to be a powerful way to connect with my higher self and receive answers about my life.

Within one of the scenes that presented itself while under trance was when I was the revered daughter of ancient royalty within the high mountains of South America.  I was dearly loved by my parents whopresided over the members of our small mountainside community.  I was taught early within that lifetime that I was to be a gift to the Gods through becoming a child sacrifice.  I did not question this role as it was considered an honor.  Entering womanhood was signified by beginning my monthly bleeding.  I was about 13yrs of age.  Within that week, I donned a silver dress which had been carefully woven by the women of our village, and I walked among the entire community. It was a day of ritual where I connected and communed with every individual within our tribe to be recognized, honored and loved for the sacrifice I would endure very shortly.  It was a beautiful day, full of sunshine and I walked among the people, almost floated in fact… feeling very proud of wearing such an intricate and ornate silver dress.

When the day ended, I took off my silver dress and climbed up the mountain.  I was led by the wisest of men, an Elder within our community who would remain by my side until the end of my life.  For several days we did hike together, eat together, sleep next to one another, until we reached the sacred place where all sacrifices were completed.  

I remember trusting this man deeply, and feeling a deep sense of love and respect for him.  He was a small weathered man with many wrinkles upon his face, but when he smiled, his countenance lit up with compassion and love. He had very few teeth left, but his eyes were alive, glistening and full of wisdom.  His voice was gentle and assuring.  He wore a covering on his head, and carried a walking stick that rattled when he moved it.  The garment that covered him was robe-like and holy.  He held power and respect, yet he was the kindest and wisest of people. We were in no rush.  We moved slowly, taking many breaks along the way so we could have intimate moments of touch, teaching and sharing of food. 

My last day with him was full of love and reverence.  I understood that what we were completing together was a unified act of love.  I willingly lay upon the alter and waited for him to swiftly place the knife into my heart which would end my life.  

As I lay in wait, my gaze was upon him.  With disbelief, I, the observer of the scene watched his face turn into the face of my present mother.  I saw all of the love and admiration that she had for me, and understood that we had been so many things to each other, including taking one another’s life. I came out of hypnosis with eyes that were wide with surprise, yet full of tears.

 The event mysteriously connected me with some corresponding younger memories within my present life.

There were times as a child when I woke up with headaches during the night and would approach my mother to awaken her and ask her to help me.  I was about 10 years old when on one such night, I prompted her for assistance. She was in-between the sleep state and awake-ness, and she directed me to, “go and first take off your silver dress, my love”. 

 At the time, I did not understand what she was talking about.  When she was more awake, I asked her about her comment.  She told me that within the dream state she watched me when I was a princess who was wearing a silver dress, and she described how regal I looked as I walked among the people with my beautiful silver dress on. She shared “it was like you were floating or gliding along and you were so happy and full of love”.  When I emerged from the past-life hypnosis scene, I knew my mother and I were closely connected on many realms, lifetimes and realities.  Her energy signature is close to mine, and we are learning-partners for one another.  When we are in harmony, there is no relationship that is more supportive and understanding.  Yet when one of us is out of balance, it becomes a learning experience, or a practice opportunity and it can sting harshly when we react to each other without much thought or awareness.

It is easy as a human to forget the soul ties and relationships that we have forged with others prior to our present lifetime.  But they can be uncovered in many ways when we desire to know more about those relationships.  We just need to pay attention to the signals when those clues are revealed.

Roger Mutimer